Sunday, November 9, 2008

Local News

Okay, last time I posted, I was telling all of you something about what it's like to live in Seattle. Tonight was a good slice of the picture. I'm all fucked up, and on my way home, I stop into a bar. It's a local landmark. The Blue Moon.

And a band gets up on stage and starts singing:

Dan! DAN!
The Dirty Baker Man!
He will Lick Your Ass
But he will not clean a Pan!

Just think about that a minute. It's kinda deep.

Update: I just got a myspace message from the band saying that every word of that song is true!

Anyway, the band was called Kled, their website is Here. Check it out. Read the blurb, which says:

"Kled is low-brow heavy metal disco spawned in the mountains of Montana in the late 90's. The brainless child of guitarist/vocalist Pat Phlymm, Kled was born out of rural USA ennui coupled with modern dance-theatre performance art. Kled's songs straddle the fence between such capital-letter topics as Poop and Death, while bubbling in a stylistically perverse rock'em and sock'em context. Augmented by the knuckledragging antics of But,Cake (drums) and Beirdo (bass), Kled is on a mindless mission to aurally tackle the most sardonic of hipsters and the most repressed of conservatives by opening hearts, minds, and colons along the way. .."

But this is how I walk home on a weekend. This is what happens when you live in Seattle.

I was just on Facebook pointing out how sad it was that Merle Haggard's scheduled show at the Emerald Queen had been cancelled. Then, because I get my news from Skippystalin I quickly found out why the show was cancelled. This is what happens when you know where to go for your news. I pity all you fools who go elsewhere.

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